It's still September

Since I was small it was very hard for me to go out for trip.Even the school trips or with friends.Why?Because i don't have budget on that.I am poor.I got 7 younger siblings which I have to consider their needs rather to consider  myself.So usually I will decline the offer and try my best to forget it.

Now I am almost 30, I never go out from Malaysia.The place that I went maybe not even reach 10 places, or maybe just four places.Of course waterfall near my house is not in the list okay.I am talking about places that we need to plan and put budget on it.

Usually my annual leave is fulfilled with something like stay at home with family.Now I am getting older and I have enough money but I don't have friends to go out and travel.Reason? Most of them are married and sometimes my work does not let me go.

Okay, actually there a reason why I write all those stories above.There one incident that happened on lovely Tuesday.

We having like two projects that need our commitment in August and September.Actually I just completed one task for July and there some pending projects that have dateline around August and September.We cannot be certain on that because some requirements still pending and etc.

We have to give our vacation plan so it will be easy to manage the resources.Of course,I didn't have much plan because all the reason above-i don't have friends for any trip and don't have plan to go trip by myself.So my vacation is like only 2 or 3 days just for Ramadhan and Hari Raya.That's all.

So we send our  plan to our Project Manager.After that suddenly out of blue, my old friend ping me and ask me to accompany her to Sarawak.OMG, at last I have a  place to go with friend.We are so excited talking about hotel, tour, budget bla..bla. Actually she wanted to attend her friend's wedding plus we will have time to explore Kuching,Sarawak.I never been there so of course I was super duper excited.

So I resend the vacation plan again.Now it become a little bit controversy because my vacation will be in September.My teammate asked,  "Why so sudden?"

"It's out of blue."Yes, it's very bad month to go why we have a lot of incoming projects at that time.I knew that, but I am thinking if we can complete it faster, I will be able to go.But a lot of things still pending for the project to kick off.We haven't receive any final requirement , we not receive any fix schedule.All in the unsure-list yet, so there big possibilities that the project can not be completed in early September.

"Maybe you can put reason why you are not available in those date.Our concern is we might be seem to  force US team to follow our vacation plan."He advised.

Reason?So can I write something like this, "I am not available in those date because I have to go for vacation or attend wedding".Does it sound right?In the critical time, I am giving those reasons?

Okay.I become 'tawar hati' already.Suddenly I wanted to cry.It's like all my excitement gone.I open back my email.Read it and write something like this.

"Correction, is not in September.It is in November.Please let me know if the date is not convenient for you." I clicked Send.

"Humm...you're talking to me about September, even in your previous email also September.This is girl power." He typed to me.He surely read my email and feel weird.I talked and acted differently right?

I am not sure what his mean by girl power.Is it mean that girl always cheat, or girl always change their mind?Honestly , I don't give a damn with the meaning anymore.

The trip still happen in September.But I could not join it due to job commitment.Now, why I put November?

I don't have any plan in November.I am not sure myself what will happen to me in November.But I just put it because I mad maybe.Mad to myself.Surely I will find something to do in November, maybe alone.Who knows?